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AGD Interviews, part one: Dashplant

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Hey guys, we at AGD are a pretty tight community. We talk on the chatbox a lot and I thought it would be fun if we got some more information on some of the members. Like little stories about what they do for a living, their life etc. So here is the first interview with Kasplant. I have asked a few questions but most of the information here was gleamed from him talking about his life in the chatbox. So it may have a few slight inaccuracies. So without further ado, here is the interview. I have made it into more of a autobiography as a QA section can be a bit tiresome.




The rain glistened in the soft moonlight in the lonely town of Doesburg. However this sleepy town is not all that it seemed. It had a hidden secret, of cheese and men. Kasplant was one such man, born in Rotterdam, a lover of cheese and woman. That woman was Elisa Globeberg. 

Elisa sat at home waiting for Kasplant, she checked the clock on the wall. It had been just 5 minutes since she had last checked, but for her it felt like an eternity. Kasplant had left several days prior to get some of their favorite Danish cheese. 

The trip should only have taken a day or two weather permitted. Kasplant had been acting strange of late, he was arriving home at all hours with cheese that Elisa had never seen before. The cheese contained strange and wondrous flavors. When Elisa asked Kas about 
where he got the cheese he would always let out a hearty chuckle and say "Why Dutchland of course!" (For there was no finer cheese according to the couple). Kasplant was also throwing more parties, men of culture from across the land would come and experience this new danish cheese. But Elisa felt something was wrong, it wasn't like Kas to leave home for so long. Was he cheating on her? No of course not, it would not do to think of such things.


Meanwhile, Kasplant was lying in a dark alleyway in Doesburg. He was sound asleep with some drool pooling onto the sidewalk. Beside him was a baguette and some cheap brie. He awoke suddenly with a snort and looked at his soundings. "I cant keep living like this" he thought to himself. Kasplant stood up and straightened his coat, on the corner of the street was a dark and grungy bar named "Le Fromage". He stomped over to the bar and entered. Inside was an old Holland man named "La Beast". Kas simply nodded at him and threw five 100 euro bills on the table. The old manslowly went into the back and came back with a wheel of Gouda, he grimaced slightly and pulled out a long and dirty file and started grinding the Holland stamp off the side. When he was done he let out a long sigh and heated up a Danish cheese stamp and pressed it firmly into the cheese. Kasplant nodded and put the cheese into his napsack, wondering once again how he got mixed up in all this. The cheese mafia was no joking matter. Before he left he looked into the eyes of "Le Beast" but only a blank stare greeted him, a man can only do this trade for so long beforeall life and morality are drained slowly from your body. 


Kasplant returned to Rotterdam early the next morning, he went straight home to his beloved Elisa. He burst through the door and exclaimed happy "Look at this great new Danish cheese I found". However upon reaching the end of his sentence he saw that Elisa was sitting at the table
head in hands weeping over a pile of swiss cheese. "I found this under your bed!" she proclaimed angrily. We will only eat Danish cheese in this house! She screamed. She was right of course, Kas felt sick to his stomach. All the years of smuggling Holland cheese into Dutchland had left a toll on poor Kass. Without a word he simply walked into his bedroom, opened the drawer and pulled out a small pistol. He put the gun to his head and pulled the trigger. 


Elisa once again sits alone as flashing lights and police sirens surround her house. "How long will this take again" She inquires to the police detective that was assigned her case. "Could take weeks mam" the officer replied. Your husband was a high ranking cheese mafioso. Who knows how much illegal cheese he smuggled into this country. Once again, loneliness surrounded her, all she had ever known was the seductive taste of a fine danish cheese. But was she even eating danish cheese after all? She would never know. 


Several months later Elisa was moved into witness protection. She had taken up game making as a hobby. She had a sex change to become a man and decided to name herself Dashplant after her deceased husband. She decided to join a hobby game making forum and start life anew.



And that it folks! Just a little information about Kasplants heritage and how he became a game maker!


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